Personal Blog

in which I share thoughts and memories

Vidui 5780

On this Day of Atonement,I ask forgivenessfor nothing. I have been deceptivesmiling when I ached insidepretending all was well and…

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Shidduchim Escapades

shidduch (plural shidduchim) = match / arranged dateshadchan (plural shadchanim) = matchmakershadchante (plural shadchantes) = female matchmaker (though often she’s…

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Kosher Water

As I refilled my water bottle from my school’s water fountain today, I remembered this incident: When I started college,…

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Force Fields

I grew up with the idea that some spaces are off-limits. Of course, places like government buildings and construction sites are…

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Frummed Out

In twelfth grade, I applied to the Macaulay Honors College at CUNY, through Brooklyn College. The Macaulay program includes a…

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Immodest

It was the first time I could stay for my program’s Friday afternoon events. I had moved out of my…

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Pantsless

My mother and sisters often shop at Macy’s which is right near the CUNY Graduate Center, where I am quite often.…

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Farshtelt

(Farshtelt – Yiddish for “dressed up,” “disguised.”) Purim – a time to dress up and pretend to be someone you’re…

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Bad Influence

It’s a truth universally acknowledged that someone who found liberation will try to liberate others. Or at least that’s the common…

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Dissonance

A strange sort of dissonance happens when I listen to songs from my childhood. More often than not, I listen…

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Out with the Old

כל התחלות קשותוהיום עוד רגע התחילהתחלות וחדשותורגע אתמול מפיל All beginnings are difficultAnd another moment begins todayBeginnings and new starts…

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עוף החול באש

אין התחלה בלי סוףתמיד מוות לפני החייםמשל למות העוףאין עוף החול מאבד חיים איזה נחמה מופלאהחיים אחרי האש בוערתאיזה פחד…

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לב סורר ומורה

התחלות הן קשותאומרים ליבוודאיאני אומרתאני יודעתבאמת אז מדועשואלים,מדוע את בוכה אין לי ברירהמשיבה כשלקחתי ברירהכשאמרתי״יש לי ברירה!״ברירה אחרתנלקחה ממני עדיין…

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Rock Climbing

written in spring 2014, a few months after leaving home and religion You’ve struggled through the steep climb, forcing one…

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Blinders On

written in spring 2014, a few months after leaving home and religion It starts so simply.A bit of defense, armoragainst…

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Unwritten

There are two kinds of people.Those who respond toa writing assignment abouttheir own liveswith blank looksat blank pages -what can…

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Citation

on the oddness of being misrepresented to shadchanim It’s weird to hear your own words repeated.It’s even weirder to hear…

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